X Bionic Energizer Boxer Shorts

Normally I have a poke about something first, weigh up the pros and cons, try it in the mirror with different hats and then head onto the hill for a wee test. Well these cyber-boxers arrived this morning and I just stuck them on and went out the door. It’s synthetic underwear, if I’d given it any thought I’d have put it in the microwave for 30 minutes and pleaded ignorance when the distributor asked me how I was getting on with them.
They are spray on tight, but also super soft with an amazing amount of stretch so although they came out of the box looking the right size for Action Man they went on fine. I am on the limit of the Medium though.

Now the construction is all zones of different stuff, designed to compress, stretch, breathe, make air flow where they want it to and make you warmer or cooler. That’s a big task for a pair of pants, even fancy pants.
What happens a lot of times with base layer boxers is that there’s no allowance made for your ratchet and socket set round the front. Here we have allowance. Your stuff is “guided” to a mustering point and kept in line by fabrics of different weights, and cool with wee vents. Due to the thin, slightly see-through fabric here it does make your codlings look like a particularly ugly bank robber with a stocking on his head, but it works and comfort and stability at speed on rough ground is definitely supplied. Also this is why there is only a small picture of my arse and no more…

As you can see I unwittingly slipped off of my merino high horse here. I was out all day, it was hot, I was running some of the time and the boxers stayed dry, they stayed cool, and they stayed comfy as well. Out of the box chaffe-less movement. I stand impressed. There’s no label for me to cut off on there either, all the fabric into etc is in the waistband stitching.
They’re in the wash now and I’m hoping they survive. I’ll be back with more after a bit.

The packaging is horrific though. It’s like a deluxe VHS box set from the early ’90s, with opening flaps and an inner slip case for the pants. Buy them and leave the packaging in the shop. A greaseproof paper bag with a website address printed on it as all you need in these days of diminishing resources.

21 thoughts on “X Bionic Energizer Boxer Shorts”

  1. Ah, so they still come with all the ridiculous packaging then? I tried a pair a year or so ago. You don’t get chance to leave it in the shop when you buy online.

    How ‘technical’ can a pair of pants get? The claims on the box are a ridiculous case of marketing over-hype.

    That said, they are pretty comfy. I’d just like the legs to be a bit longer.

  2. Agreed, I was expecting the legs to ride up as they’re not as long as my usual Smartwool boxers. I was almost disapppointed they worked so well.

    I was having a look at the tops and they must be the most complicated garments ever constructed.

    I’ll read the box later with a mug of cocoa…

  3. I was!

    I haven’t been brave enough yet to get any ‘technical’ underwear, I’m very particular as to what I like. But the summer has shown that cotton isn’t necessarily the best when the temperature rises. Time to look again me thinks.

  4. It’s the way to go. I took to techno pants early on, braving the horrors of the smelly Helly’s until Polartec got sorted with the better fabrics.
    Much of it is tight fit which is good, but means it has to be spot on for you or you’ll suffer.
    Merino is king, I wear it all the time, but I’m genuinely surprised at how much I liked these X-pants. They don’t feel like normal synthetic, they’re not clammy at all and soft against the skin.
    Luckily they’re mostly under trousers.

  5. Two points:

    Firstly I’ll admit that I too have fallen off the merino wagon recently and tried a pair of synthetic Nike Dri Fit sport boxer thingys. They are much cooler and lighter than my Icebreaker keks but I’ve yet to discover what the long term stink-factor will be.

    Secondly, I do hope that photo wasn’t done with a self-timer PTC……

  6. The stink factor of synthetics in the tent in the morning is always a worry. I’ll see how the Bionics do and report back.
    I did nearly put up a manufacturers shot of them btw, sod it though, that’s lazy. Luckily I have an understanding wife.

  7. Yeah we know the Packaging is an issue, it is being looked at. there was talk of growing the paper Hydroponically but the finish was not good enough, we’re waiting to see what comes next!

  8. Hydroponics always makes me think of Bruce Dern burying his his crew in the spaceship’s garden in Silent Running.

    It’s good that they’re looking at the packaging. They’re not alone though, Icebbreaker have a stupid sliding box, Smartwool had a card box with a plastic window, there’s many degrees of pointlesness on display.

    And what happens when you buy a £300 waterproof jacket? They fold it up at the checkout and stick in a poly bag. The packaging gun seems to firing indescriminately.

  9. B…limey! What a picture – this posting’s only just “work safe”.

    Nothing like getting your contract terminated during a lunch break for inappropriate browsing… ;)

    The smell factor would worry me too – be interested to how that works out.

  10. If you’re that impressed with the Energizer Boxers, just wait til you try the new Trekking t-shirt, which should be hitting the UK in the next month or so.

    If your rucksack’s straps and hip-belt are a bit skimpy on the comfort front, (as a lot of lightweight ‘sacs are) this comfy high-performance shirt has cushioning built in to protect your shoulders and hips. And that’s in addition to the very effective climate control / keep you warm when cold, cool when warm / compression stuff already going on in the shirt. How cool is that!

    As for the pong factor, this shouldn’t be a problem as the material used should help to combat this. I’d go so far as to say that the wiffability factor is far less than several other leading base layer brands.

  11. Aye, the knitted-looking pads. I think that might be the top I saw, oddly appointed garments indeed.
    I’m always willing to have my mind changed and to be proved wrong, so it has been enlightening trying the Energizer Boxers after being exclusively in merino for so long. I wouldn’t mind trying one of the shirts actually, I’ll need to speak nicely to them!

    Interesting point about lightweight sacks. Any lightweight sack I get that doesn’t have a proper harness gets put back in the plastic bag it came in. Definitely one area not to scrimp on, but they do try it.

  12. i recently bought some of these as ive worn my 2 pairs of haglofs boxers out, got them in the sale at one outdoors, so far ive been very impressed with them.

    i totally agree about the packaging, it is way OTT, but different none the less.

    hopefully they will last a while but i guess only time will tell.

  13. I’ve been wearing them a bit and they’re really soft, no sign of wear. Looking good.

    Talking of synthetic underear, this time next week I might be wearing Paramo underwear…

  14. I was just wondering how these were ermm ‘bottoming out’?

    I have a pair of icebreakers that I’m just not getting on with for outdoor wear as they just don’t provide enough support and have a large seam at the back of the waistband that rubs under my rucsac.

    Are the Bionics still as soft as ever and what is the ‘stink factor’ like? Can you also expand on the sizing. You said you were on the limit of medium – where would I with a 32″ waist stand?

  15. They’re doing really well, I’ve been wearing them a lot. Definitely less stinky that that last sythetics I had which were Lowe Alpine Dryflo things.
    I think the small/medium might fit you okay, they’re tiny when unstretched so I think they’ll do from what looks like about 24″ up to my 34″/36″ fluctuating waist line.

  16. Thanks for the info, am looking to get a couple of pairs myself but am unsure whether to go for the compression ones that you have or one called the ‘Vitalizer’. They are both X-Bionic and more or less the same price. I am a distance runner so didn’t wanted something tight but soft and flexible (so it doesn’t feel like it’s sticking to me!) All I know is that the Compression one is Medium Impact and the Vitalizer low impact – but not too sure how that will affect the underwear. Anyone have any idea about which I should go for?


  17. The only pointer I can give is that although the Energizer is tight it’s ultra soft, so I wouldn’t bother going down a notch to the Vitalizer.
    Because it’s next to the skin, you just don’t know how it’ll suit you until you’ve tried it.

  18. Thanks. I imagine their likely to be very similar and I already wear the Enegizer socks which I like very much so there shouldn’t be a problem. Thanks very much!

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