Licensed to Ill

I just recently got my photo driving licence. Whatever the man likes to infer, the paper one was legal as long as there were no detail changes or endorsements, so it was working fine for me although it was now eight separate pieces of paper rather than a folded sheet of pink A4.

But, comparing to friends and family it appears that all licences are not equal. Joycee who passed her test around 11 or 12 years ago has two categories on the back which she’s allowed to drive: cars and and transit vans with a couple of seats in the back. Mother has just a couple more from an early 80’s driving test, golf carts and street sweepers of something and me and Jimmy have an almost full card, Jimmy being the winner having all the motorcycle stuff and HGV stuff. Neither of us can drive a big bus with paying passengers though, so it’s not quite a golden ticket.

I thought this odd since I got my licence in ’86 and Jimmy got his in the ’50s. Mother was inbetween and got nothing despite sitting the same kind of test that I did a few years later. I had all the categories on my paper licence but I did expect them to be withdrawn when I got the plastic government spy card because of the time lapse. Not so, whatever you were allowed behind the wheel of at the time you got your licence, you can still drive badly with complete impunity today.
Great for hiring big trucks, towing caravans or driving minibuses, but all done on a test with no theory paper. Are they saying that certain years are producing better drivers? If so they must be using astrology or something equally arbitrary to decide on it, or maybe the government put experimental chemicals into the water in certain years and want to restrict drivers who might be affected…

You can’t say it’s not true, cos you don’y know for sure it isn’t.
Get your licence out, look at the back… what did the government do to you…



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